Self-Help Readers Tend To Buy More Than Once
My self-help ranges from overcoming anxiety and shyness, sexuality and dating advice. Those who buy such products usually will buy again. What’s the reason for it?
The reason is the books and products are based on satisfying an insecurity.
The creators usually don’t solve the insecurity, its fueled instead.
A classic advice I’ve seen on several different dating/sex ebook:
“Punish a woman if she says ‘not tonight’ by giving her less attention. When she does something you like reward her and give her more attention.”
This is my question…if a woman says she doesn’t want to have sex tonight, why should anyone need to act on it? The basis of it being…she says “not tonight” guy feels that ping of rejection, and to compensate for it uses a mental “combat” technique.
If you didn’t catch it, the technique feeds his insecurity. The technique creates a self-perpetual loop of insecure emotions that’s hard to get rid of.
These books give some good advice, but “feeding insecurity” is woven in to keep you looking for ways to stay ahead of the “game”. It’s really an illusion of staying ahead, most of it is the same information.
So the buyer keeps coming back. Makes you want more of the same re-packaged products.
So who’s most vulnerable to these tactics? It’s shy, socially awkward or introverted men who keep coming back for more because the underlying message being delivered is “you need to stay ahead”.
How do I know this? Well, I went through dozens of such programs like dating, relationships etc… and what I found is that most of them SUCK! Yet, they still sell nonetheless.
I haven’t found a program out there that says “This technique will make women BEG to be with you. If she’s not interested in having sex with you then probably there’s an underlying issue just between the two of you. End on a good note and simply leave. Because the techniques I just taught you will get you more women than you can handle instead of wasting time playing games.”
Why “pretend” to leave her as a threat? Just do it as a way to stay on good terms.
In order to get out of that insecurity “loop” and find something that WORKS you need to find advice that focuses on deeper issues. The brains we have today isn’t so different from the brains people had 40 years ago. We essentially play out the same games from thousands of years ago even if we have different societal cultures.
We’re still playing the acceptance game, mating game, status game etc…
There’s more innate and more powerful wiring inside of us to work with. These “wiring” provides more effective strategies than your surface level techniques that you have to constantly replenish.
I wrote an ebook about the deeper more powerful self-help aspects of social dynamics BUT I won’t refer you to it yet. The ebook I wrote is NOT for everyone, if you’re interested check out some of my articles and see if you resonate with it.
You can check them out here at surfsocialwaves.com/blog
Talk to you soon!
Your friend,
Chris C.
This entry was posted on Saturday, February 18th, 2012 at 12:23 am and is filed under Self Help and Motivation. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.